Don’t rule out Mediation in relation to domestic abuse.
17th January 2022 by Gemma Burden
If you have come out of a relationship involving domestic abuse, you will have the challenging task of needing to make arrangements with your ex at a time when you are also trying to separate from them emotionally and physically. This is understandably a distressing and daunting challenge and one where appropriate boundaries and safeguards will be of utmost importance.
Many people will assume that the presence of domestic abuse in a relationship will render mediation unsuitable but we would like to reassure you that this is not always the case. We have put together some things to think about before you rule out the mediation option altogether:
- A mediator is trained to screen for domestic abuse and take the presence of domestic abuse into account at all stages of the mediation process. Your Mediator will understand the different guises of domestic abuse and you will be able to discuss your circumstances in confidence at the initial Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM). This is a chance for you to discuss any concerns that you might have with your mediator and a chance for your Mediator to help you decide whether mediation would be suitable in your case.
- Mediation can help you establish some ground rules and boundaries that regulate your parental relationship with your ex-partner. This enables you to manage the arrangements in a way that ensures the physical and emotional safety of you and your children moving forward.
- You do not have to mediate face to face in the same room as each other. Your mediator can offer Shuttle Mediation where you are both in separate rooms so that you do not have to directly see or hear each other.
- Another alternative option is online mediation sessions via Zoom, either as a group call or as separate calls without the other person on the screen with you at all. This means you can mediate from the safety of your own home where you can feel more at ease and less intimidated.
- If you are not sure whether mediation is suitable, a chat with a mediator at a MIAM appointment will help you understand your options and formulate a plan of action moving forward.
If you would like any further advice on whether you feel Mediation is suitable for your situation, visit our Family Mediation page on our website or contact our Mediation department directly on 01202 377993 or g.burden@laceyssolicitors.co.uk
Gemma Burden
Partner — Mediation
Direct dial: 01202 377993
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“As it was mediation for divorce I was worried just how complicated it would be but it was all handled well by Gemma who put my mind at ease and explained everything well. Thank you. ”
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“Gemma was able to help us narrow the issues between us so we could focus on resolution. I feel she treated us both equally and professionally.”
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“Gemma seemed to quickly understand our situation and acted accordingly and in what I felt with best interest.”
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“I was very happy with Gemma Burden. She was very clear and to the point. Gemma Burden was very good at staying neutral. This must be very hard sometimes. She is very professional and is very good at explaining all points in mediation. I would recommend Laceys Mediation to all. I would give Gemma Burden top marks in all aspects of mediation and she has my thanks.”
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“Having used Laceys before, it was an easy choice to use them again. Gemma was professional, polite and thorough. An absolute credit to the company.”
Gemma is the head of our mediation department and a Family Mediation Council Accredited lawyer mediator. Gemma qualified as a solicitor in 2000 and joined Laceys in 2001. She has specialised in family law since qualifying as a solicitor and has worked full time as a mediator since 2009.
Gemma is qualified in all areas of family mediation, including divorce and financial settlements, child arrangements and property disputes between cohabitees. She is also qualified to see children as part of the mediation process. Gemma is able to draw on her legal expertise when helping couples work out complex financial settlements and new parenting arrangements.
In her spare time Gemma likes to spend time with her family, especially her dog who never answers back. Her chosen stress beaters are running, swimming and the beach.
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